schweblog

Any level-headed person would scoff at this, her and I spending hours getting lost in one another.  She is leaving for Lyon in less than six months, I’ve no idea what post-graduation life will have in store for me, and yet, here we are, tangling each other up with laughter and beauty and an incredible sense of peace.  For the first time in a very long time, I am finally relating to someone and feeling a very fundamental capacity to feel something for another human being.  She is warm and beautiful next to me at night and sometimes I wonder if that’s all I need right now.

We talked the other night about all of it, the weightless nature of what we have and what this all means.  This is a “casual relationship”, after all, but neither of us are willing to just let it slip by with the connotations put on such a phrase in the common vernacular.  There is more to this than me and her and the occasional night together.  There is a genuine connection that, however dynamic and potentially fleeting, is obvious when we are lying down next to one another.

It is significant, I decided, and she agreed.  What her and I have–and what we both seek, I think–is significance from this.  We are both youthful and skeptical, beautiful and guarded.  We don’t know where this is going or what is to come, but we do know that at this very moment we are happy in the arms of one another and that we both have something that the other one wants.  That is enough for us.  That is enough to make us happy.  It is rickety and sometimes awkward, but we are having fun in the embrace of another and we do not care if they scoff.  This is daring.  This is new.  This is us.